...don't hate yourself for it.
Mistakes are how we learn, how we grow and how we evolve.
They're exactly how we become "our best selves," even though that's an inaccurate term because we're already our best selves, merely learning how to reveal and express it.
If every time you fall short of your expectations, you become your own biggest critic, change will always feel like an obligation because you're punishing yourself for being human.
No thank you says the soul.
I'd rather stay the same, than beat myself up for being imperfect.
Damn it--the whole point of transformation is enjoyability!
When are we going to start seeing that?
Think of a time when you made a mistake, and it was met by a critical tone; you hardly heard what was said because you immediately shut down to protect yourself from the incoming shame, guilt, and humiliation and as a result, your worth was diminished, absolutely no learning took place, and the mistakes continued.
This is a lose-lose-lose situation.
On the other hand, recall a time when you made a mistake, and it was intersected by kind, constructive, and generous feedback; you remained open because you felt safe, appreciated, and valuable and as a result, your worth expanded, and your mistake actually led to progress.
This is biology and spirituality 101.
Next time you slip up (and you will), and you reactively begin badgering yourself (or others), and you become aware of it, try this...
1. Take a deep breath and disengage
2. Non-judgmentally notice how you've participated in the mistake (multi-tasking, waited till the 11th hour, trying to be everything to everyone, etc.)
3. Shift the focus from the mistake to the learning opportunity
4. Take another deep breath
5. Through a spirit of gratitude, resilience, and integrity, move on
Yes, this is a win-win-win because that's what love does, love wins.
"The great and merciful surprise is that we come to Love, not by doing it right, but by doing it wrong." Richard Rohr