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The birthplace of urgency



When your self-esteem is performance-derived, time is your enemy, and life is a race against the clock.


Because time means there are limits on how much you can get done, restricting how much self-worth you can create in a day.


This creates obvious and predictable challenges, and of course, this a game you cannot win, nor is there ever a happy ending.


The mother of urgency is the false self, defined as who you are according to your experiences.


That painful experience of rejection you had, the one that made you feel excluded, inferior, and insignificant--yep, that one you remember like it happened yesterday, let's focus on that one for a moment.


Or, maybe you didn't have that acute, defining experience of rejection, maybe yours was more subtle and chronic--perhaps you had an absentee parent, you were only recognized for performance, you didn't measure up to a sibling, or you had incredibly high expectations placed upon you.


Whatever emotional potholes you've encountered in the past, rest assured, you're a perfect adaptation to all of your experiences.


The urgency manifests because those wounds are unsettled, so it's likely you stay busy in an attempt to numb painful feelings, disprove your past, or both.


The "solution" to balancing urgent ways of being is to acknowledge you've subconsciously conflated the events of your past for your identity.


Only your True Self (who you are apart from your experiences) is capable of rest.



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