I never thought I'd write this particular blog, not because I don't enjoy writing, but because I never thought I could heal so profoundly from my past.
I was abused as a child, and for the first 40 years of my life, I subconsciously allowed those painful events to define me, rendering me worthless, pathetic, and broken.
And of course, I became the exact story I told myself: empty and shameful, inferior and insignificant, and hateful and disgusted.
As far as I was concerned, you could have thrown me out with the Friday trash, and no one would have noticed the difference between me and the garbage.
Though, as I continue seeking the truth that resides within me, I've realized that I've assigned that value to those events and, subsequently, myself.
This awareness has preceded my transformation—I've since recognized I was able to change my perception of my story, and I have.
Within 72 hours, a foundation has settled within me; I sense a stillness, and feelings of okayness, enoughness, acceptance, abundance, and freedom.
Richard Rohr, a Franciscan priest, who has been catalytic in transforming my life from the inside-out, says: "Transformed people, transform people."
I want nothing more than to help everyone I can to feel this way too, to have a taste of their True Self—who they are apart from their experiences.
For anyone struggling with low self-esteem, anxiety, depression, or any feeling that communicates scarcity, I would strongly encourage you to move into your pain, any experiences of rejection that have shaped you, and reassign the value you place upon them so you may bask in peaceful, loving joy.
What's fascinating is my past has not changed, yet my perception of it has, and now I'm free.
Thank you for reading this.
"The mind, once stretched by a new idea, never returns to its original dimensions." Ralph Waldo Emerson