Picking yourself

Updated: Jan 4

The Whole Person Blog: Week One, Day One - Picking Yourself

Writings inspired by Seth Godin: What to Do When It's Your Turn (and It's Always Your Turn)

Sunday, December 29th, 2019

I'm as nervous as I am excited to explore new forms of composing my blogs. Traditionally, my writing has emanated from client encounters, sharing the little gems I've picked up in my interactions with them. They were random, unstructured, and free-flowing, and fueled by passionate inspiration driven by my unique insights. However, the transformation I've undergone this past year by way of discovering my True Self (who I am apart from the painful experiences of my past), has disrupted (and I mean that in the best possible sense) my life in ways I couldn't have ever imagined, expected, or prepared for. One manifestation of my metamorphosis is to approach daily writing in a more ordered, intentional, and structured way. Please understand that previously I've always avoided this style of writing, as I've interpreted structure as a painful obligation. However, the freedom within me has recontextualized my relationship with planned effort. For the first time in my life, I don't feel threatened by evolution, and it feels wonderful.

"Tear off the mask. Your face is glorious." Rumi

As an experiment, over the next three months, I'm going to share some of the books that have been instrumental in increasing my levels of consciousness, ultimately leading to the rediscovery of my True Self. Seth Godin, though his platform is marketing, he offers a universal message of love that has taught me how to pick myself, instead of waiting to be picked by others. Think of the playground, how we all hoped to be chosen for the activity of the day. If we were picked, we were good, and if we weren't, we weren't :-( These experiences are so deep-seated, it's as if they happened yesterday. As they say, the solution is in the situation. Our Experiences (WHAT happened to us) are not the same as our Identity (WHO we are), and I'm here to shout this message from the rooftops this year with a goal to share the message of Stop Chasing your Symptoms with 1000 new people this year. More to come.

Four pages into this brightly-colored, well-designed book, and you'll discover it's "YOUR TURN TO:


Speak up.

Stand out.

Build a following.

Market a product.

Make a connection

Solve an interesting problem.

Write, sing, invent, create, ask a question, launch a project, organize a protest, open the door for someone, question authority, make a short film, direct, produce, create, or adopt.

Learn a new skill.

Help someone who needs you.

Be missed if you're gone.


Seth, like no other, provokes us to express ourselves in ways that reflect our courage, our values, and the leader within us all. The biggest challenge we encounter is the story we tell ourselves about ourselves. Before we act, we scan the archives containing the ill-defining experiences of our past (abuse, rejection, neglect, etc.), and our survival brain, which is designed to avoid pain, encourages us to stay small and avoid the risk of having others validate what we already believe about ourselves. In turn, we never speak up or stand out, not because we don't want to, but because our memories tell us it's not safe to do so.

As a MindBodySpirit® Coach, I've observed that living a small life, more than anything else, is responsible for eroding the soul, and the physical diseases that follow: broken hearts in the form of heart disease, self-rejection in the form of cancer, and self-doubt in the form of anxiety and depression. Biology follows psychology!

The key to choosing yourself is to solve your identity crisis. The problem is you don't realize you have one. You've subconsciously mistaken your Experiences for your Identity, and your life is always perfectly reflecting who you think you are. Your True Self will be rediscovered on the other side of these questions:

  • Who was I before I was wounded?

  • Why am I allowing my painful experiences (driven by other's insecurities) to define me?

  • As a True Self, what am I empowered to do that I was previously unable to do?

To rediscover your original goodness, register for this Monday's YES meditation here. If you like this post, please share it :-)

"I see it all perfectly; there are two possible situations--once can either do this or that. My honest opinion and my friendly advice is this: do it or do not do it--you will regret both. ... To dare is to lose one's footing momentarily. Not to dare is to lose oneself." Soren Kierkegaard



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