You can't become peaceful, loving, and joyous because you already are peaceful, loving, and joyous.
Trying misses the point!
Simply draw your attention to whatever stories you tell yourself about what gets in the way of it and surrender.
Therefore, your lack of peaceful loving joy is proportionate to your need for control.
"The ultimate truth is so simple; it is nothing more than being in one's natural, original state." Ramana Maharshi