Culturally, it appears we have a "rainbows and butterflies" notion of love.
While of course, this notion of love does exist along the spectrum, the self-love required to perform self-care and endure change is a bit different.
Love, as it relates to transformation, is more synonymous with the words and experiences of uncertainty, discomfort, sacrifice, intimidation, and mystery.
Love often doesn't "feel" good in many scenarios, and if you don't understand or appreciate that, you'll choose comfort over courage most days of the week and hate yourself for it and blame it on laziness, demotivation or a lack of will power.
A woman bearing and delivering a child, the loss of a loved one, children moving off to college, holding space for someone in pain, replacing criticism with compassion, choosing a salad when you want a sandwich, working two jobs to make ends meet, and skipping vacation to afford tuition are all experiences of love that are uncomfortable in the moment.
I spend a considerable amount of time helping clients recontextualize the symbolic meaning of love as it relates to change by connecting it to words and qualities like vulnerability, courage, commitment, faith, and curiosity.
The ultimate goal is to expand their notion of love to include themselves, which inherently solves most problems and reaches most goals.
"When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change." Wayne Dyer