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Doing well vs. Being well



I recently had a text conversation with a friend I hadn't spoken to in a bit, and of course, we each wanted to know how the other was doing.


When he asked how I was, I responded: "Everything is incredible because I've learned how to derive my joy from within and it's reflecting all around me."


To which he replied: "That's awesome you're doing so well!"


While I graciously received his sentiment, the phrase "doing well" really caught my attention because I realized for the first time in my adult life, I'm not "doing" well as much as I am well.


Prior to that, I fundamentally believed wellness came by way of doing the right things, and if I wanted to win the prize, I had to play the game.


Today, as a result of embracing a descending lifestyle (letting go of the stories I was telling myself about what I thought I needed to be happy), wellness has delivered itself to me, rather than me chasing it.


My reply back was: "I'm not doing well as much as I am well. The thing within me that's well is also within you! It's pure gift and is accepted through a spirit of humility and surrender."


I'm not sure how he received it, but I intended to remove my ego (who defines itself by what it does and has) from the spotlight and grant him the permission to just be well, too.


Once he responded with: "Talking the talk, walking the walk," I was tempted to put my ego front and center to receive all the glory, but I've been necessarily humiliated by my falsehood so many times, I accepted his statement for what it was and let it pass.


Just a few years ago, I wouldn't have believed I could drastically improve my quality of life by challenging my assumptions and releasing the narratives I've adopted that kept me from experiencing intrinsic joy.


Wellness, as it ends up, is less about doing and more about being.



"When peace like a river attendeth my way. When sorrows like sea billows roll. Whatever my lot, thou hast taught me to say, it is well, it is well with my soul." Horatio Spafford

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