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Do we need to ask?



The Whole Person Blog: Week Five, Day One, Part 2/2 - Do we need to ask?

Writings inspired by Fr. Richard Rohr: Breathing Under Water: Spirituality and the Twelve Steps

Video presentation based on the book

Daily Meditations written by Richard Rohr on 12-Step Spirituality

Breathing Under Water online course

Sunday, January 26th, 2020


Step 7: Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.


In order to pray and ask a Higher Power to remove your shortcomings, you're first required to acknowledge them, a practice I imagine most would never pursue because the ego hates mirrors. However, this radical awareness and accountability, perfectly positions the brave soul who asks, seeks, and knocks, an opportunity to take meaningful action, leading to forward motion and liberation from their falsehood.


After 20 years of serving the health, fitness, and wellness industry, I realize 99.9% of the people I serve don't recognize they're already whole, only needing to surrender the baggage they've acquired as a result of their emotional injuries. On the one hand, that's a sad story, and on the other, I'm honored and privileged to be the first to share the good news of wholeness with them. And while you may think this grace-centered message would be warmly received, it's often met with utter criticism and a rejection of any notion of infinite love.


"Well, if God already knows what we need before we ask, and God actually cares about us more than we care about ourselves, then why must we ask God to remove our shortcomings? Are we trying to talk God into things? Does the group with the most and the best prayers win? Is the prayer of petition just another way to get what we want? Or is it to get God on our side? In every case, notice that we are trying to take control.


Nonetheless, there's an important mystery to asking. We ask not to change God but to change ourselves. We pray to form a living relationship, not to get things done. Prayer is a symbiotic relationship with life, and with God, a synergy that creates a result larger than the exchange itself. God knows that we need to pray to keep the symbiotic relationship moving and growing. Prayer is not a way to try to control God or even get what we want. The answer to every prayer is one, the same, and the best: the Holy Spirit! God gives us power more than answers."


During client encounters, I walk along the edges of these conversations, gently allowing them to acknowledge their painful experiences, unmet needs, and their desperate attempts to disprove their past. I don't see them as shortcomings, as much as I interpret them as adaptations to the ill-defining moments of their history. As they come to observe their gaping void, rather than trying to fill it (which is impossible), I help them to acknowledge it, permit them to grieve it and include it into their story so they can transcend the limits they've placed upon themselves.


To you, my reader, I hope what I'm saying makes sense, and you can connect the dots because I'm trying to guide you down a road that leads to freedom. In fact, I've carved a clear path to it, and I call it The Whole Person Project. What my friend, Kim Kaschak, refers to as the most significant project we'll ever take on: ourselves. It will help you outgrow the primary problem of (subconsciously) overly-identifying with the painful experiences of your past, and I've lowered the price 30% to make healing and transformation more accessible!


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"If you are not radically grateful every day, resentment always takes over." Richard Rohr

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